Melancholic Bubbles

Once again, I apologize for skipping a few days, I've just either been busy or too tired to write. But I march on writing, taking notice of my avid fans and the necessity to record this journey. Friday was a fun day, for the most part, minus the Jewish History test and essay. I think I rocked the shit out of that essay, but the test is another story, me messing up a bunch of answers and being prepared for the facts not on the test (of course it would happen to me). Afterwords I dont exactly recall what I had done, but probably just stayed in my room. And this is another thing. I hate staying in my room (most of the time) during free time and not hanging out with people. The fault is probably mine for not making the effort, but it seems like all my other friends go back to their rooms too. Maybe its just the select few who hang out outside on school nights. I hope so. This type of thing was also a problem at camp (for the few days I actually spent there last summer) where I would stay in my cabin and listen to music or read or whatnot if nobody else was around. Trust me, I never wanted to do that, but gladly, over the years I've been at camp, its dramatically improved, whereas last year it was a smaller issue.

So friday night I dressed up in my suit and bowtie (pictures are up on fbook for those stalker-types) and people generally liked it a lot, and it took me a lot of guts to go at it alone, but I told myself that I needed to do something brave like that. At least its brave on my personal scale. I was hoping that the girl I liked would notice, and she did, but very briefly and it wasnt even spoken, it was with silent hand gestures. I dont know if that significant or not. At least its something instead of nothing or dissaproval. I also told myself that it would weed out the people I wouldn't want to be friends with, them being the ones without a sense of humour who would think I was strange. But nonetheless I rocked it. That night I watched some Freaks and Geeks with two people/friends, and Saturday I watched more with other people, about 4 of them. Im still hoping to one day making a Girl Talk party. That would be so amazing and beautiful. ahhhhhhh. I also missed calling my friend's radio show back in the States because I was talking to my parents and sister.

My Sister, as well as an avid reader of this blog *wink wink* have given me some advice for social stuff, including stuff about the girl who I like, who will henceforth be known as Z. My sister gave the advice to take things slowly ad talk to her more and not to worry about it too much and let it control me. God knows I dont want to be that kind of person, being obsessed over someone. It was generally reassuring. Also the avid reader who gave me advice, didnt actually give me any real, practical advice at all, but nonetheless I thoroughly enjoyed our conversation and I did recieve a tip or two. Its strange, because we only occasionally talked before, but now, whenever we're both on fbook, we always talk. I'm just really clueless to this whole people business, and sometimes I think about that and everything else (THE everything else) in ways that dont necessarily benefit my mood. I just need to narrow my focus while remaining open minded, and head a sure course. I need to ignore or make retreat my demons, and rebuild the ruins of my previous life. Like a Phoenix from ashes. But sometimes I can't help it, and it overwhelms me. I get stuck in a ditch and can't escape for a while.

Well besides that, classes are overwhelmingly stupid and idiotic, making no sense with idiotic teachers that dont know what theyre teaching. Except for my Jewish history and hebrew classes. that because those are the mandatory ones on the program. But the rest have teahcers that dont understand the material and have no logical order in which they teach. Speaking of classes, I need to go to class right now. So au revoir, averderzen, goodbye, shalom, etc, etc, I hope you have a good day Sir or Madam.